The Legend of the Kahiki...

Long ago...in a "country" far, far away...lived 4 ridiculously immature, goofy, fun-loving, and loyal friends...

Who grew up and had many children (all of the female gender)...

And...perhaps, maybe...they are still as immature, goofy, fun-loving and loyal as they ever were...if not even more:)

.....................................

So, I pretty much stink at "make-believe" stories...but the premise remains...

We vacationed last week with our awesome friends...Let's call them the Awesome A's :) 

We made our way northward to pick up our children from their "Camp Michigan" with their grandparents and Auntie...and then we headed on our way towards the west...

It's odd, having grown up in the mitten state, that I never actually vacationed on the west side, outside of camp trips or a day trip visit. (at least that I can actually remember)  So, I was anxious to explore the white sands and NON-salty lake water...which I was told was MUCH better than the Lake Erie I swam in as a youngster...ahhh, sewage water:)  FUN:)

I was also very excited to introduce Sand Dunes to my girls as well...

Little did I know that Uncle G was looking forward to combining his love of Geocaching along side my sand dune desire...we discovered that this combination may or maynot have been a good "marriage" of sorts...

But, we pressed on...and all in all, the week was a success...

It started out upon meeting "Johnny" our smoker-friendly-voiced landlord who gave us the keys to a very old, yet charming beach house...right there on the lake.  The older girls immediately claimed the tiny upstairs apartment to which they began to scour and clean...and write up a chore list for the week.  (This lasted all of about 1 day...maybe just half a day, I'm not sure:)

We obviously had to head out to the beach to explore...at which point, the dad's showed their displeasure of the women folk claiming the beach, whilst they went out into the looming, cold waters...but, we marched on in our "camera-protection" plan and sand-sculpting ideas:)

 

We eventually got in the water (if just for a quick 5 minute dip)...and everyone enjoyed building sand castles, flying kites and playing frisbee on the beach!

...and capturing "monsters" on the beach???

 

Our house saddled up alongside the splash pad and carousel...both of which proved to be WINNERS in the girls' books...

We then meandered on over to the Sand Dunes...where Uncle G gave the run down...about the run down...to which no one really listened, but ran aimlessly down the hillside, sometimes falling face first, only to jump back up and keep going:)  This is not a good idea when you have over $5000 worth of camera equipment on your back..I repeat, it is NOT a good idea...

 but, I did it anyway...

We also continued our Geocaching while there...talk about "walking through the dessert on a horse with no name"...minus the horse...we gave up after 3 ups and downs and opted for ice cream in town instead.

The geocaching thing is mighty cool, I might interject:)  Uncle G introduced it to us and we have become quite addicted.  Whereas Italian Stallion enjoys the hunt and the "micro" finds...the girls like it better when they get to give/take a trinket.

We took a stroll to the lighthouse and of course, had some family photo moments...

The highlight however brings us back to the "Legend of the Kahiki" (like how I bring it all back around again?)  Way back when, when Italian Stallion, G, Sara and I all went out to eat...back when we didn't have to cut other people's food or share sips or take 15 potty breaks during the appetizers.  Back then, we laughed and relished our "maturity"...we bought these crazy Kahiki Mugs and have been "gifting" them back and forth ever since.

Due to the fact that we have each exploded our families and dinners out do not even come close to resembling "life back then"...Sara came up with the idea that we should "compete" for the mugs...as in, an Annual Family Competition!!  Awesome A's versus Terrific T's...nice, corny team names:) 

And so, the games began...complete with Opening Music and everything!

 

We made our Olympic themed flip flops for the competition as well!

 

By the end, we tallied the scores, we "made up some categories" and thus, the Terrific T's beat out the Awesome A's for the coveted Kahiki Cups!!! Sara was amazing with all her planning...from the cupcakes to the medals given out...she and Aunt Mel had it down!!!

I took over 900 pictures and quite honestly, could write and post about them all!!!  But, I will spare you (just this time) and plan to get them into a scrapbook at some point this summer. 

Thank you sweet friends for a memorable vacation...it reminds me how wonderful heaven will be someday...we soooo need to have mansions next door to each other!!!

Girlie:)

I never put bows in my baby girls' hair...or headbands or glitter...neither did they wear cutesie, frilly dresses or pretty shoes...

Pretty much, my girls wore denim...denim overalls, denim jumpers, plain tees or onesies.

I never much was a girlie girl and so I suppose it rubbed off onto my "parental dresscode" for my babies.

I now have a total of three girls...1.2.3.

They are girlie, nevertheless...princess, nails, pink, purple and glitz...(sometimes I think it's God's way of putting a bit of my sister Sarah into my life, because it reminds me a lot of her:)

Anyway, the only way I can justify what I purchased yesterday is just to say that I "had it saved up" because I never spent moneys on frills when they were babies:) 

I've been enjoying my "Kid-Free" days here of late...I've been running to stores that I know they'd not want to go into...lunching with friends and wandering around antique flea markets...just for fun. 

I happened upon an "etsy-ish" store yesterday during my stroll in a neighboring quaint town and fell in love...the creativity exploded in front of my eyes...

Now, of course, it meant that I was storing up information so that I could actually replicate what I was seeing instead of purchasing...that's the sort of cheapskate I am...but in reality, I would LOVE to just create stuff all day...just not the SAME THING all day...I'd like to make a bag, then a bow, then some clothes, then a purse...but, that's besides the point...

I was amazed at the colors, the ideas, the talent...it was such a great little place...Infact, I think what made it even more fun was that it was an old 1800s house that had been turned into a store...therefore, each room had it's own "theme" and I must have spent at least an hour in there exploring.

I entered the back room (probably the main living area to folks way back when) and I stared in awe...dresses sewn, cupcake decor packages, monogrammed coffee mugs, handmade rings & bows...and then in the back they had purchased a display from an outside company...just for tweens & teens...

Locker decor:

We're talkin' magnets, mirrors, note pads, flowers, WALL PAPER...you name it...It was laughable and completely frivolous...but I LOVED IT!  I loved it because it screamed GIRLS! 

and it made me giggle:)

So, I bought this for my little "entering 5th grade" girl for her locker. 




What is it you ask?  Why, it's a motion detector light chandelier that magnetizes to the top of her locker.  This along with some homemade "wallpaper" and other stuff (that we will create together when they get home) will make her locker all girly and fun...and I know I'm completely ridiculous...but, for the first time, it feels fun to just give in to the silliness of it all. 

we don't give in to a lot of the other "stuff" that others have...and really, I'm not even copying off anyone here...or trying to "keep up with the jones" or any other such nonsense:)  It just made me think of her when I passed by and I hope she giggles with me and knows that her Momma loves her and thinks she's worth a fun splurge:)

So there you have it...

today I'm baking and making pickles...fun combination huh?  And then, I'll probably head off and do my "last fun thing" before we get packed up and head up to get our girls back from their "camp fun"! 

What a great gift of a week!

Things I can do when my girls aren't with me..

This week my girls are with my parents for a week of "camp"...

Yep, I said "camp"...

it's not camp like you might be thinking though...it's more like hanging out with Grandma, Papa and Auntie when they have a ton of activities planned, fun food to eat, lots of playing & crafts...

Okay, so maybe IT IS like camp...

whatever it is, the girls are having a BLAST!!!

My mom and sister have got everything planned out to the minute...

The girls earn points by cleaning up...they have Bible time, Rest Time, Craft Time, Play Time...and my sis has made sure that there is at least one BIG event each day...

Tonight they are having a campfire and sleeping outside in a tent...only to awaken and "shower" in their swimsuits in the sprinkler...

My girls think they have died and gone to heaven I believe:)

and these pictures are only from DAY ONE!!! 

So, what's a mom to do when her girls are gone away from her all week?  Who will she talk to?  How will she function without the joys of mediation, helping with the potty, tying shoes, cleaning up spilled apple juice?

I'll tell you what she does...by golly...

***side note, before I begin...please understand that although I jest and sarcasticly revel in the joys of being "childless" for the week...this follows the buckets of tears that were shed as we left them and headed home...this is communicated with the knowledge that I WILL get these sweet girls back in a few short days in order to love on them and smother them with kisses until Little Munchkin's arm is wet from wiping them all off!...just sayin'***

THIS MOM...

Listens to something other than Veggie Tales, Princess CDs and books on tape...infact, I have discovered that the RADIO is still built into the current model of cars these days...imagine that...AND, they have stations...AMAZING!!!

Drinks froo-froo drinks and does not have to share SIPS with every little voice in the car...I get to slurp down the whole thing myself!!!

Reads books other than The Penderwicks, Biscuit Goes Somewhere and Chicka Chicka Boom Boom...and oh my, am I reading...stayed up until 1am last night...(stupid idea by the way) but, I CAN and that's what makes it fun:)

I'm sure that I will discover LOTS more fun things that I can do whilst I am kid-free...but, right now, I'm busy eating chocolate out in the open and hanging out in my pjs because I don't have anywhere else to be...

well, I'll be...there ARE more things to add to my list:)

20 years later...

Remember when you were 10 years old and you thought your parents were old? Or when you were in high school and even those in college seemed light years away?

Then you fast forward through time and college and marriage and babies and sending your little one off to Kindergarten and...and...and...

BAM..the next thing you know, YOU now feel light years away from that little 10 year old, or in this case from that little 17 year old high school graduate...

This past weekend was my 20 year high school reunion.  I hadn't made it to the other ones due to family conflicts and such...but, there was a reason behind subjecting myself to the blatant awareness of AGE this time around!!!

For some, reunions may be a waste of time...and I understand the mindset of "I keep in contact with whom I want already, no need to muddy the waters (so to speak)"

For me, however, it's not about showing off or sitting around reminiscing about old times (although that can be fun especially when you consider the ridiculous-ness of some of my high school antics and/or "nerd-dom"...READ: falling off the back of a car, as a rep in the middle of the homecoming parade (have I written about that yet?) 

Anyway, I believe in moments...yes, quality time and investment are incredibly valuable...and strong relationships can't just survive on little snippets...However, I believe that there ARE moments of opportunity!  Opportunity to say just the right thing or be in the right place at the right time...opportunity to offer encouragement, to bring a smile to someone who may not be having the best of days (or weeks or years) 

I went last weekend with a bit of "trepidation", I'll be honest...I was not only a nerd in high school, but a worry-wart and sometimes I think kids either walked around on eggshells around me so as to not "offend" OR they just put up with me because, let's face it, there weren't many in our graduating class to begin with:) 

Life has a way of maturing us...it also has a way of carving us into the people we were meant to be...for some that means pain, loss, difficulties...and by those events they are continually shaped and molded and changed.  20 years changes people...and though I will admit that I was curious as to the change just because I'm an extroverted people person...I was more wanting to make a connection and if by some miracle I could let someone know that they were special and that the person they are still becoming is pretty awesome...then, I wanted to do it.

Does that sound arrogant?  I hope it doesn't...it's not meant to say that I have arrived by any means...

Infact, it may have been selfish of me in a sense because I wanted to be encouraged as well...

I met up with the brother of my sister, Sarah's good friend.  His sister, Jamie, had had medical issues as well.  She was at the hospital the day that Sarah died.  I never told him that.  Jamie lived until she reached age 25.  We talked for maybe 15 minutes that evening, but it was time I wouldn't trade for the world.

My friends married incredible spouses that I had the opportunity to meet.  I'm not only so grateful that they have someone to journey with through life, but it broadened my horizons, my perspective...to see them again, as wives/husbands and moms/dads:)

My friend Carol is living through the trial of her life, and has been for the past 4 years...She is inspirational and strong and optimistic.  I wouldn't have passed up the opportunity to see her spirit for anything!

I'm so thankful that we all got together last weekend...we laughed, I cried, we laughed some more...

Yes, it's been awhile...20 years to be exact...but, there is just something about meeting up with people who lived life with you in the beginning...

I wonder what another 20 years will bring...

13 years...13 reasons

Italian Stallion was pondering yesterday how to "celebrate" 13 years...it's not a "big" year, in the sense of popularity...it's not 10 or 20...it's not even divisible by 5...

For some it may just seem old hat or just a passing, "yippe, we made it 13 years...can you put in a load of laundry?" (and I'd be remiss if I didn't say that I'm on my way to accomplishing just that as soon as I get my thoughts out on "paper")

He argued that we should call it the "LUCKY 13" (you know, because 13 is supposedly an unlucky number)...if you know my hubby, this "idea" won't come as a surprise to you at all:)  but, because there is a chance that my young niece could potentially read this blog, we'll just keep it to a family rating of G and let it at that:)

A couple years back I gave the whole run-down on how I knew he was THE ONE:) I never tire of the story because it still amazes me...even now...however, for the sake of not boring others by continual repetition (or being redundant...good grief)...I thought I would take the opportunity to just list 13 reasons why I'm so thankful to wake up next to this guy everyday:)

1. He makes life fun and interesting.  He's not boring...when he talks, people listen...he's not afraid to take risks and he makes it a priority to try to make me & the girls happy!

2. He's genuine, sincere and generous...not just with his money, but with his time and energy.  He doesn't just play with our girls, but he goes out of his way to make sure his nieces and nephews know that they are special to him...he looks for ways to show compassion to those he cares about.

3. He's loyal...he makes a decision and sticks to it...faithful, living by a standard of integrity.  This category right here was the hardest for me to trust way back when...when I was scared of marriage...but, he continues to prove it to me over and over again.

4. He's got nice legs:)  You know me...

5. He's patient...oh goodness sakes, is he patient.  I don't know how he manages this one...especially in our house...I'm not saying that he never loses his cool, but MAN, it has to get BAD before a temper starts to form...and even then, he's usually one to excuse himself to another room until he calms it down:)  I need to take lessons...

6. He likes me:)

7. He's a decision maker and confident...but, even if he knows he's right, he'll wait until I figure something out on my own so that I have that feeling of accomplishment too:)

8. He likes being around...he has the occassional golf outing or movie going with a couple friends...but his heart is at home...I like that he likes to be around us.

9. He's helpful...i.e. he cleans out my van, folds clothes and cleans the kitchen...without complaining I might add...WOW!

10.  He knows how to make me feel loved and does it.  I can't say that this comes naturally, but he figured it out and makes the effort continuously.

11. He was a on a puppet team too in college so if he teases me about puppets, by golly, I've got him right back...HA!

12. He let's me be creative even if it means his basement is a disaster and there is "stuff" all over the house from multiple "projects" that I've enlisted.

13. We share the same belief in God, Jesus and the H.S.:)  He's not ashamed or shy to talk about it, and he lives it out...

He's my man:) Best thing I ever said YES to in my life:)  Happy Anniversay love:)

Busy-ness

With our wedding anniversary just around the corner (or 2 days away if you want to get specific) I thought it quite applicable that our church is doing a multiple week talk/series on marriage.

they like to run commercials like these:



Basically, the premise is that there are marriage monsters..."termites" that will destroy a marriage.  Each week they touch on a different aspect of marriage...it's been enlightening, to say the least.

This week, the title was "The Busy Termite"...last week, it was about Culture.

I think the thing that strikes me and has been slowly developing into my mind over the past months is this whole idea of the "slow fade"...it's the quiet justification of things here and there that don't seem all that "bad", but as Pastor Aaron pointed out:  "You start stacking on a bunch of good things to accomplish in a day and the day becomes evil" (Ephs 5:15)  I love that our church is pulling this thought into the realm of marriage because it's been in my heart with regards to parenting...and I"m now coming to the understanding that it really engulfs all aspects of our lives.

He had a really neat example today that really got me thinking when it comes to truth.  You know those picture in picture things on the television?  Not closed captioning, but where you can see a tiny picture in the corner and then the bigger picture on the whole screen?  He likened our world to the big screen...hyped up, HD color, sending messages like "live life to be happy", "get what you want now and get more", "life is all about you"...and then in this tiny little window there is another message being sent.  It's not invisible, it's not hidden...truth is there, you just have to tune into it...it's a smaller voice, perhaps a smaller window. 

And yet, how often do we just follow after what culture deems "awesome" or "our right" or "you make your own truth"

He talked about being soul-mates...not roommates or even in-mates...

He pointed out some questions for us to ponder such as...IF you are doing and living however it is you are doing and living...to what end?  What are we gaining by our relentless pursuit of more (i.e. BUSY-ness: activities, money, things)?

He offered solutions such as giving up your rights, evaluation of activity, saying no and practicing a sabbath...

I gotta tell you...in today's society...how much it has slowly evolved and changed from the 1920's, 1950's, even from the 1990's...how much more is "acceptable" today...by setting out to just achieve more, putting money/activity/popularity/prestige/work/sports/social media in front of relationships to which we pledged our commitment...what are we doing not only to ourselves, but to our children?

He pointed out that if we just continue to say yes to every activity and toy and whim that our children desire, we are setting them up for failure...failure in future relationships specifically...because they learn at a young age that "life is all about ME and reaching MY personal goals"...it teaches them that it matters not that you and everyone you come in contact with is running around like a chicken with their head cut off...so BUSY with stuff that there is no time to connect...to what end?  to what glory?

I have friends and family that we rarely see anymore...mostly because they are just too busy...they've got one thing after another.  I can understand "seasons" of busyness...IS gets those in work, with travel...but there is an end.  I haven't seen an end for some of my family/friends...it's always the next best thing and then off again onto something else...I am not trying to sound judgmental, I just miss them...

Now, I don't believe Pastor Aaron was squashing goal setting or determination...I don't believe he was saying that trying to do your best was wrong...however, I do believe he was trying to say (and I think I'm coming to agree with him) that even GOOD things can become BAD things...

If we can't begin to detach ourselves from the compulsions of society, then we ARE like a herd...just "following the next butt in front of us"...

I asked Italian Stallion if the termite of busyness was evident in our marriage...I'm a stay at home mom and our children haven't hit Jr. High yet...so I know that that struggle will get worse as we go along.  But, we agreed, even though we have said no to many sports opportunities and classes and such for our kids...and even though we tend to guard our family time not just at the dinner table, but on weekends when Daddy is not working...and even though we chose to live where we live so that our girls could spend lots of time playing with each other and us, developing those relationships...we still need to keep our guard up against too much time spent on electronic devices (watching TV, ipads, video games) And that's just one practical way to hedge our marriage/family. 

I can't tell you how thankful I am for a husband who is in tune to things like this...who isn't afraid to admit when he is wrong (although he might be apt to tell you that it's VERY RARE:)...who is on guard and has a much better perspective on life and how God calls us to live it than I do ...We're coming up on 13 years of marriage and nearly 20 years of being friends...I'm thankful that we're on this journey together...

If you want the message from today, I'm sure you can find it on the church's website: GRACE POINT

Head in a Muck

I've been thinking about some things for a long while now.  I have not come to a conclusion by any means...in fact, there are so many ins and outs and grey areas that I don't know if I'll ever have a definitive answer for every single situation...but, it's not going away...and therefore, I have to deal with it.

As you know, we have daughters...and with daughters come all sorts of fun, exciting and DRAMATIC issues.  (I'm sure moms of sons could say the same thing, but I don't know since I don't have any boys, and I can only speak from my own experience)

We have reached the "tween" years with our eldest and I would be putting it lightly if I said that I've been reading up on all sorts of topics lately...everything from modesty, purity, relationships, health, skin care, social media, the internet...the list goes on and on...and my library book basket is filled to the brim.

The "latest" thing that has been brought to the forefront of my mind is the issue of modesty/purity. (however, as you continue to read this post, you'll see a blending of topics because my mind can't seem to differentiate between them all...and this is where I get stuck in the muck and pray for clear thinking)

Let me give you some background...I was brought up in a church where I perceived that what was acceptable were high neck collared dresses that reached down below your knees.  Everything I owned was a size XL and I wore a tee-shirt and shorts over my bathing suit to any type of pool related activity.  I came to believe that my body was something to hide from others...completely. 

That is extreme...I don't want that for my girls and I don't honestly believe that is what God wanted either.

They already know that their mother doesn't have much fashion sense (and that's where we depend on wonderful aunts that know their way around a shopping mall and make-up counters)

Sweetpea isn't even into the whole fashion scene at all yet...she just wants to be comfortable and look nice...but, I know a time is coming when we'll have to address the "fashion" of this era and what "everyone else" is wearing.  And, I have to tell you, that I'm a bit nervous. 

It's always been a slippery slope...fashions get more and more "loose" and extreme...and what is deemed "IN" will always push the boundaries...it's what our culture does...

But, how to live with it?  I'm struggling...(thankful that I hopefully have a few more months/years to dwell on it before we have to take a stand on something...but still, I want to start having those conversations now...)

Let me give you just one example of something that happened the other day...something that just gave me more to think about (because it deals not just with what someone is wearing, or not wearing, but what exactly are they are trying to convey). 

Just the other day, due to some married woman's need to post a picture of her half naked/bikini clad self on facebook, my husband turned to me and said, "thank you for not doing this ..." and quickly scrolled away and ultimately ended up "defriending" her from his account...(Italian Stallion has made it clear to me that he "only has eyes for me"...he has made it a purposeful decision to live this way...I'm not saying that I've married a perfect man...nor am I claiming that temptation is never a problem..I do NOT want to sound like we have "arrived" by any means!!! I only say this because he has given me insight into how guys think and the measures he has taken, and continues to take to live according to what he believes God has called him)

My first reaction was to judge...I know it's wrong...but, I did...what purpose does a woman have in posting such a picture where she knows that her "friends" are males...she must also realize that in doing so, she's going to cause other women to covet and become jealous...she's going to cause men to desire her body...don't get me wrong...I would be lying if I said it doesn't feel good to get whistled at or have people comment about my "looks"...who doesn't like a compliment?  But to what end?  When there is little left to the imagination, how does that affect someone else's thought life? 

But, does it even matter?  Maybe God doesn't care about it...maybe He just made us to be that way and doesn't mind when we flaunt it?  Maybe He wants to punish the people who have those thoughts after looking at such images?  Maybe He thinks it's perfectly fine to show everything (but just a few covered spots:), especially if you've worked out so long and have it to show?  Maybe I'm only responsible for myself, and if I know I look good then the heck with everyone else, it's their problem? 

It goes even further than clothing...Would you agree that there is something in us that just "knows" when someone is trying to "prove" something rather than just sharing their life with you?  I find it increasingly more difficult to scroll through pictures on facebook when I have that "feeling" that the "friend" is trying to "show off"...I've been guilty of it myself...I get proud when my kiddos do something...or when we actually don't kill the pepper plants...I'm utterfly thankful for what God has blessed us with...but, how do I or do I even, share with my friends and family?

What am I trying to convey?...what is my purpose?  Do I want others to be jealous of me? Do I want others to compliment me?  Do I want others to know how great I have it?

You are reading words from a photographer...someone who LOVES herself a good picture...I feel like pictures tell stories...You've heard the saying, "a picture is worth a thousand words"...they give insight into what others deem important and worthy...Pictures are memories for me...

Where am I going with all this?  To be honest, when I shared my thoughts with Italian Stallion he said, "you do realize that you are blending a ton of conversations into one scenario here?"  I know I am...My mind is jumbled with: what is modest? what is pure? what are the motives? what do I convey? what's the purpose?...

It started off with questions like, "Will we allow our girls to wear bikinis? (knowing that inevitably they will get posted somewhere on social media) to Why do people post certain things anyway? to What am I trying to convey about myself and what I think, when I dress or post any picture anywhere?"

Where does this leave me?  I still don't have answers...everyone has justifications and their own ideas...and really, I KNOW that I'm not responsible for others raise their children...however, I'm trying to find out where I fit...it has caused me to seriously consider my own basis for not just what I wear or will allow my girls to wear, but what I 'put out there' in this generation of cyberspace and the ability to "share life" with others with a click of a button.

It all seems complicated and I don't want to get my panties all up in a bunch...but at the same time, I've said it before and I'll say it again...I'm after my girls' hearts...I will fight to the end to protect, to guide, to forgive, to heal, to cherish, to celebrate, and to travel this journey with them...in the hopes that the decisions they make, the life they lead...it will not only be immeasurably fullfilling, but will be pleasing to the One who made them so wonderfully:)