This week has been a rough "parenting" week...it's been speckled with a lack of confidence on my part, frustration and impatience. (I'm being brutally honest here:)
Having 3 children at 3 completely different 'seasons' of life sometimes makes me feel completely stretched to the limit...now, I know that those that have more than 3 kids or have multiples, obviously have it harder...but for now, I'm humoring myself and just saying that we are each given what we can handle...and my "handling" hasn't gone that well this week...at least in my opinion.
My eldest is starting to think for herself...she needs more guidance and room to make mistakes...this is extremely hard for me. I'm perfectionistic at times and it kills me to watch her make silly mistakes. There are times that I have crushed her spirit with my impatience. She has the most compassionate heart and is a true people pleaser...I struggle with how to guide and yet lead her to be indepedent.
My second born is a "free spirit"...she doesn't stress over the little things...good in some instances but a complete frustration in others...she'll be a "mary" when she grows up instead of a "martha", but noone will want to come over because there won't be room for the "stuff" all over the place that she hasn't cleaned. She bounces back easily and therefore it's a bit easier for me to parent because she doesn't get as "hurt" by my shortcomings. On the other hand, because of that I let it go too much...there's so much more i COULD be doing for her...
And then, my baby...she is my stubborn, strong-willed little thing. I am at a loss with her...my energy level is SHOT by the end of the day. There are times I just call Anthony in the middle of that day and just ask him, "What in the world do I do with her?" She doesn't take as much "intellectual" energy as she does "physical" and "emotional".
Anyway, it's been a rough week...I'm just bein' honest...not trying to be a "downer" or anything...I don't have this parenting thing figured out in the least.
I'm hoping for a refreshing weekend and a renewed vision...I think I need to go a "date" with my eldest, play in the snow with my middle and sit and do puzzles, eat suckers, and dance with my baby and perhaps things wil get a little better:)
Friday, January 23, 2009
Saturday, January 17, 2009
My Sewing Adventure
I’m one of those people who likes to Improvise! It’s a challenge for me to figure out how to make something or fix something when I don’t have all the right pieces. That could be part of the reason why I’m a pack rat as well…countless times I’ve plodded down to my basement to pick through my “junk” to see what I could use, in order to “Improvise” and fix my problem.
I’ve gotten so much to be that improvising person that I almost feel at a loss when I actually have all the tools at my fingertips. In fact, you might even say that at that point I get panicky…you see, when you don’t have all the right “parts” there is no pressure for it to come out perfect…it just has to work, not look beautiful or anything…just do the job.
Now, there are times that I’m perfectionistic, don’t get me wrong. When it comes to painting furniture or walls, or when I’m making something for someone else…then I get really particular about the little things. But, for everyday life, I just want to be efficient (some could confuse that with lazy or just wanting to rush to get it done…and you could argue that point with me…but, for now…let’s just call it efficiency)
Which brings me to my bright idea to make hats and scarves for my girls. You would think with my mother being an incredible seamstress…the one who CREATED my wedding dress without a pattern…that perhaps I’d inherited her talent…not so! No, my idea is that “sewing” is much more easily done with a stapler. But, I do try on occasion to “stretch” myself…so, I picked up a 99cent pattern and some 40% off fleece and came home to “sew”…
Another thing you need to know about me: I don’t like reading directions and then being expected to follow them exactly. I’d rather someone just show me and I’ll copy them. Putting all these “qualities” together: an improvising nature, not liking directions, rather work with a stapler, will choose efficiency over perfection, and did I mention that I’m rather impatient? Well…it doesn’t make a good mix for the whole, “Let’s make some cute hats and scarves for the girls!”
By midnight last night after ripping apart the “headbands” at least twice, I was about ready to give up…I called both my mother in law AND my mother for help and encouragement…for heavens sake, all we’re talkin’ here is a mere hat and scarf…how hard can it be…I so wanted to just pick up some heavy duty duct tape and slap it together fast…but I persevered!
Well…to end this pathetic story…here are photos of the finished products. I’ll have to get the girls to model them at another time, but I’m just so glad that I’m finished. I did end up cutting up 2 fleece blankets that I had.., yep, you guessed it, IN THE BASEMENT!!! In order to have some contrast colors…had that “bright idea” right in the middle of the project…just so happened that the blankets contrasted well with their coats!!!
Thanks Mom for at least introducing me to the sewing machine and keeping staplers at a safe distance for some of the time…thanks Mom T for explaining over the phone umpteen times what the directions were really saying…and to those of you that are seamstresses, yes, I know I look the fool and I do so admire your abilities…keep it up!!!
I’ve gotten so much to be that improvising person that I almost feel at a loss when I actually have all the tools at my fingertips. In fact, you might even say that at that point I get panicky…you see, when you don’t have all the right “parts” there is no pressure for it to come out perfect…it just has to work, not look beautiful or anything…just do the job.
Now, there are times that I’m perfectionistic, don’t get me wrong. When it comes to painting furniture or walls, or when I’m making something for someone else…then I get really particular about the little things. But, for everyday life, I just want to be efficient (some could confuse that with lazy or just wanting to rush to get it done…and you could argue that point with me…but, for now…let’s just call it efficiency)
Which brings me to my bright idea to make hats and scarves for my girls. You would think with my mother being an incredible seamstress…the one who CREATED my wedding dress without a pattern…that perhaps I’d inherited her talent…not so! No, my idea is that “sewing” is much more easily done with a stapler. But, I do try on occasion to “stretch” myself…so, I picked up a 99cent pattern and some 40% off fleece and came home to “sew”…
Another thing you need to know about me: I don’t like reading directions and then being expected to follow them exactly. I’d rather someone just show me and I’ll copy them. Putting all these “qualities” together: an improvising nature, not liking directions, rather work with a stapler, will choose efficiency over perfection, and did I mention that I’m rather impatient? Well…it doesn’t make a good mix for the whole, “Let’s make some cute hats and scarves for the girls!”
By midnight last night after ripping apart the “headbands” at least twice, I was about ready to give up…I called both my mother in law AND my mother for help and encouragement…for heavens sake, all we’re talkin’ here is a mere hat and scarf…how hard can it be…I so wanted to just pick up some heavy duty duct tape and slap it together fast…but I persevered!
Well…to end this pathetic story…here are photos of the finished products. I’ll have to get the girls to model them at another time, but I’m just so glad that I’m finished. I did end up cutting up 2 fleece blankets that I had.., yep, you guessed it, IN THE BASEMENT!!! In order to have some contrast colors…had that “bright idea” right in the middle of the project…just so happened that the blankets contrasted well with their coats!!!
Thanks Mom for at least introducing me to the sewing machine and keeping staplers at a safe distance for some of the time…thanks Mom T for explaining over the phone umpteen times what the directions were really saying…and to those of you that are seamstresses, yes, I know I look the fool and I do so admire your abilities…keep it up!!!
Monday, January 5, 2009
New Year Resolutions
I've never really been big into new year resolutions...I'm not the most organized person on earth. So, for me to actually make a plan and stick with it is pretty slim. I'd either loose the list or get distracted with something else while working on a list item.
Last year around this time, we purchased a treadmill. It still amazes and humbles me in big ways when I realize how fortunate our little family is...the finances and/or ability to purchase items like that...I don't know quite how else to put it. It just makes me feel spoiled, but really, really grateful...not sure if that makes sense...I just came from not so much (food stamps, homemade clothes, etc) It makes me be a frugal person and a saver...so at times it's hard to spend that money when the time comes. But, oh the amazement when it's saved up for months and we get to purchase a big item...Okay, this was COMPLETELY off the point (see what I mean about being distracted?)
Well...back to the treadmill...I'm not a runner either. I don't really like running, never have. I tried track...I stunk! My legs hurt, I'm running around a track getting no where, I get that pain in my side, I'm out of breath...all reasons to NOT like running...but we got a treadmill anyway. The point was to get in shape...neither Anthony nor myself really needed to loose weight persay, but I felt sorta "flabby" after 3 kids and figured I ought to be a good example and get my blood pumping....
It's been on and off for about a year...but Anthony has really started to like it recently and is quite the disciplined fellow...I have found that if I have "company" with my agony, I'm much more willing to go along...and so I RUN...
Can you believe that I'm running 2.5 miles in 30 minutes...now, I know for some that is laughable, but to me...that's like, pure, amazing!!! And, get this, I'm actually...dare I say it, "liking" running just a teeny weensy bit now...I got the girls on the treadmill today...they've been begging...so I let them each do 20 minutes...they LOVE it...
Who knows...maybe this whole New Year Resolutions thing will actually work this time...
Last year around this time, we purchased a treadmill. It still amazes and humbles me in big ways when I realize how fortunate our little family is...the finances and/or ability to purchase items like that...I don't know quite how else to put it. It just makes me feel spoiled, but really, really grateful...not sure if that makes sense...I just came from not so much (food stamps, homemade clothes, etc) It makes me be a frugal person and a saver...so at times it's hard to spend that money when the time comes. But, oh the amazement when it's saved up for months and we get to purchase a big item...Okay, this was COMPLETELY off the point (see what I mean about being distracted?)
Well...back to the treadmill...I'm not a runner either. I don't really like running, never have. I tried track...I stunk! My legs hurt, I'm running around a track getting no where, I get that pain in my side, I'm out of breath...all reasons to NOT like running...but we got a treadmill anyway. The point was to get in shape...neither Anthony nor myself really needed to loose weight persay, but I felt sorta "flabby" after 3 kids and figured I ought to be a good example and get my blood pumping....
It's been on and off for about a year...but Anthony has really started to like it recently and is quite the disciplined fellow...I have found that if I have "company" with my agony, I'm much more willing to go along...and so I RUN...
Can you believe that I'm running 2.5 miles in 30 minutes...now, I know for some that is laughable, but to me...that's like, pure, amazing!!! And, get this, I'm actually...dare I say it, "liking" running just a teeny weensy bit now...I got the girls on the treadmill today...they've been begging...so I let them each do 20 minutes...they LOVE it...
Who knows...maybe this whole New Year Resolutions thing will actually work this time...
Thursday, December 25, 2008
Mrs. Claus at the Gas Station
Inevitably, I forget something on Christmas Day...Italian Stallion always tries to cover all the bases...we grocery shop, we get all the last minute things on the 23rd, so that we can hunker down and just enjoy the next 2 days without a reason to "go out"...but, as I said, it always happens...whether it be milk, or diapers, or forgot something for Christmas dinner...well, it's just something...this year was no exception...
As the girls opened their games, I realized that I had purchased AA batteries...however, the games needed AAA batteries...Bless his heart, he went out IN his christmas pjs to the only gas station still open in town...it went down like this:
Italian Stallion walks into the station and heads to the counter...The little old woman behind the counter has big glasses on, her gray hair up on her head and she's reading a paper...as he approaches he can tell that she's sizing him up...He says, "Merry Christmas"...she responds, after looking him up and down, "Son, the coffee's in the back and the batteries are right here...you aren't the first and you won't be the last!"
He stood there until a smile slowly crept onto his face...she knew exactly what he and evidently many others had already trekked in to get...Merrily he got those batteries and headed back home!!!
Thanks Mrs. Claus!!! We had a great morning!!!
As the girls opened their games, I realized that I had purchased AA batteries...however, the games needed AAA batteries...Bless his heart, he went out IN his christmas pjs to the only gas station still open in town...it went down like this:
Italian Stallion walks into the station and heads to the counter...The little old woman behind the counter has big glasses on, her gray hair up on her head and she's reading a paper...as he approaches he can tell that she's sizing him up...He says, "Merry Christmas"...she responds, after looking him up and down, "Son, the coffee's in the back and the batteries are right here...you aren't the first and you won't be the last!"
He stood there until a smile slowly crept onto his face...she knew exactly what he and evidently many others had already trekked in to get...Merrily he got those batteries and headed back home!!!
Thanks Mrs. Claus!!! We had a great morning!!!
Thursday, December 18, 2008
Nutcracker Ballet
Every year since my eldest turned 4, it's been a family tradition to go see the Nutcracker Ballet at Christmas time. AND, every year, I get all teared up thinking how amazing and grateful I am that Anthony and I can do this for our girls...I was an adult before I ever saw this performance...infact, my first time was with my daughter...
My girls LOVE this experience...for weeks leading up, they are dancing with their nutcrackers at home, out come the ballet shoes and tutus...the CDs and all the different book versions that we have of the story...
When THE night arrives, they dress in their little Christmas outfits and matching black capes & muffs and off we go. This year we splurged on some really good seats! Although, I must add, that closer seats may not be all they're cracked up to be...considering my eldest made a comment about the "tights" of the Sugar Plum "prince's"...we got more of a "SHOW" than we were expecting (that's putting it very delicately I believe!:)) ANYWAY, I spent the evening "narrating" the story into E's ear...she got scared when the rats came out and told me how beautiful the flower fairies were...
It was an incredible evening AND to top it all off...the ballerinas came out at the end, after most of the audience had left and signed autographs and talked with the girls...my daughters were on clouds the rest of the night!!! What an awesome time we had together!!!
My girls LOVE this experience...for weeks leading up, they are dancing with their nutcrackers at home, out come the ballet shoes and tutus...the CDs and all the different book versions that we have of the story...
When THE night arrives, they dress in their little Christmas outfits and matching black capes & muffs and off we go. This year we splurged on some really good seats! Although, I must add, that closer seats may not be all they're cracked up to be...considering my eldest made a comment about the "tights" of the Sugar Plum "prince's"...we got more of a "SHOW" than we were expecting (that's putting it very delicately I believe!:)) ANYWAY, I spent the evening "narrating" the story into E's ear...she got scared when the rats came out and told me how beautiful the flower fairies were...
It was an incredible evening AND to top it all off...the ballerinas came out at the end, after most of the audience had left and signed autographs and talked with the girls...my daughters were on clouds the rest of the night!!! What an awesome time we had together!!!
Thursday, November 20, 2008
a quiet spirit..
I wouldn't consider myself a "quiet" person...I am energized by people, by being around people, by talking with people....goodness, I get energized just TALKING in general...my girls will be listening to music in the car and ask, "Mommy, are you talking to yourself again?"...yes, I am one that will have conversations with myself if noone else is around to listen...I think I once told someone that my dream job was to be a sought after public speaker that would talk to captive audiences of thousands...
All that said though, I really do want to have that quiet, gentle spirit...I learned what that was in college...I had a roommate who had it and I thought that I needed to calm myself down in order to "get one"...after a week of walking around being somber & aloof, my roommate finally confronted me and asked me what in the world I was doing...I'm still not quite sure how she answered with a straight face once I described my dilemma and how I was going about solving it...
Having a quiet spirit comes from the inside, not your personality on the outside...BUT...I will say that I think that those that are more introverted, introspective...yes, I might venture to say that they may have an easier time in being in tune with it...
My girls are so very different than me, personality-wise...I don't always understand it...it used to frustrate me because I so wanted to have all the answers for them...but over the few years that they have grown, I have grown too...and grown to LOVE those differences and can see the potential for them as well...
My middle child had a ballet recital today...you understand that if it were me on stage, I'd be ALL over the place...trying to get as many smiles and as much applause as I could...not so much for my little E...Bless her heart, she stayed up there the entire time...but she just STOOD there...in the past I would have been frustrated, wracking my brain trying to think of what I had done wrong and how do I get her to do her part...not any more...
I hugged her to pieces and told her how proud I was of her when the music finally stopped and she walked over to my lap. She's not a performer, she doesn't seek approval from anyone but Mommy & Daddy right now...and she won't people-please just to get applause or attention...(don't get me wrong, she's definitely rambunctious...but mostly just at home or when she feels safe) She said, "But Mommy, I didn't do anything...why are you proud of me?" My heart just swelled, "Because sweetheart, I love you no matter what you do or don't do...I love you just because you are mine!"
What an opportunity to show her love...if she were always performing or wanting to be out front, I think it would be harder for her to relate (as I had trouble) to just loving because. It amazes me the insight my little girls already have about God and his adoration of them...I don't think they struggle just yet with hearing him speak...now if Mommy could quit talking to herself and settle in the quiet once in awhile...hmmmmm...lessons I can learn from my children!
BEFORE
DURING
The turkey cookies we made for a snack...they were a big hit...good thing we saved 2 at home...by the time the girls got to the snack table, they were gone!!!
Saturday, November 1, 2008
Beautiful Day!!!
Today was just plain FUN! It was beautiful outside and we ALL went out to play...We raked and raked and had a load of leaves at the end of our slide...the girls took turns figuring different ways to "land" in the pile! Our neighbor girl came over to help! Just had to post the pics, cuz they're just so darn cute!!!
Entitled: Going....Going....GONE!!!
Entitled: Going....Going....GONE!!!
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